Effective communication is the bedrock of any healthy relationship, yet many couples find themselves struggling with common communication issues. 

Whether it’s defensiveness, criticism, or unmet mutual expectations, these pitfalls can create distance, erode trust, and weaken the connection between partners. 

As a marriage and family therapist, , I’ve worked with many couples who unknowingly fall into these patterns.

Do you struggle relaxing and managing your stress levels?

In this month’s Therapy Moment, Victoria Mahoney, ALMFT shares with us a tool to help increase feelings of relaxation and to better manage stress!

Marriage is a beautiful journey that couples embark upon together that is filled with moments of joy, challenges and growth. One of the critical aspects that can significantly impact the health of a marriage is finances. 

Do you struggle feeling comfortable talking about money with your partner? Have you made some financial mistakes in the past that you are afraid to bring up to your significant other?

Financial health in marriage goes beyond just balancing accounts and saving; it encompasses communication, mutual understanding and shared decision-making. 

Do you have an untold story that you feel is holding you back from living your best life? Maybe it’s trauma you’ve experienced, pain or shame that you’ve been afraid to talk to with other people.

In this month’s Therapy Moment, Victoria Meeks, ALMFT reminds us that therapy is an excellent place where you can come tell your untold story to someone who won’t judge and who will listen and help encourage you to find new freedom from what you may be fearing.

Do you find yourself mindlessly scrolling through social media when you are bored? 

Does your partner ever point out how you are glued to your phone rather than spending quality time with them?

Have you ever felt the need to compare yourself to those on social media as a way to validate your self-worth? Or maybe your recent social media post didn’t generate as many “likes” as you had wanted and now you are left feeling upset and angry.

These are all common things that happen when we prioritize social media into our daily lives.

Are you struggling to understand and cope with the loss of someone or something that hasn’t passed on?

Do you feel hopeless, confused, sad, unable to sleep, or are you experiencing an inability to move forward as a result of being separated from who you used to know?

If so; you may be experiencing ambiguous loss.

Ambiguous loss is a profound sense of sadness and loss that is not associated with the death of a loved one. It consists of a lack of closure due to either physical or psychological absence. 

Have you ever wondered what you can do to get the most out of therapy in order to receive lasting results?

If so; you aren't alone!

In this month's Therapy Moment, Victoria Mahoney ALMFT shares 3 tips on how to get the most out of doing therapy in order to improve yourself and your relationship with others!

Have you ever been triggered by your partner? 

Maybe your spouse offered you some advice on how to do something around the house better and more efficiently. You took that as your partner being condescending so it triggered you to get defensive.

If you’ve ever felt this way; you aren’t alone! 

Your partner may not have meant to elicit that kind of a response from you but you can’t help but feel the way you do.

So, how do you work past feeling triggered by the things your partner may say or do?

Do you notice how on certain days you are able to respond better to stress than others? Certainly it depends on the physical and emotional context under which the stress occurs, but did you know it also has to do with one's tolerance level?

Increasing distress tolerance allows for improved emotional regulation, feeling more in control, and decreased likelihood of emotional outbursts.

Do you struggle with how to empathize with others?

Oftentimes, people listen to a loved one share something troubling going on in their life and their initial reaction is to help them "solve" or "fix" their issue. What's often missed is the importance of empathizing with their difficult emotions first.

Empathy is incredibly important because it allows you to connect with someone important to you on an emotional level.

What comes to mind when you hear the word “grief”?

For most people, the word “grief” likely elicits a number of thoughts and feelings, and it is often associated with the loss of a life. 

And then there is the loss associated with positive things, such as the loss involved when we set healthy boundaries, release an unhealthy coping mechanism, change careers, or move to a new city. This is what I call the grief in the good.  

Are you interested in making some changes within your life such as quitting a bad habit that's formed, going to the gym more often or maybe it's simply to spend more time with your loved ones?

In this month's Therapy Moment, Victoria Meeks, ALMFT helps us identify the different stages of change to help create awareness of where you are at in the process of accomplishing your goals!

Do you feel the holidays seem to have a way of bringing up difficult emotions that we so often try to forget? If so; I'm here to tell you that you're not alone and that grief, especially during the holidays, is normal. 

One thing that most of us all have in common across the world is the experience of loss. Loss of a loved one, an opportunity, time, money, a relationship...you name it!

Unfortunately, in these past two years we have been hit by loss in a way that we weren't expecting and as we near the holidays, the impact of those loses can make being joyful and thankful a little harder. 

Have you ever found yourself struggling to manage difficult emotions from past experiences that you previously processed and/or healed from?  

Have you ever engaged in unhealthy coping behaviors while managing current difficult situations?

If you answered yes to either of the above, know that you aren’t alone as I have too!

A few weeks ago, I personally found myself examining why certain behaviors, fears, thoughts, and emotions continue to appear in my relationships with others, especially since I have done the work to “let it go”.